BORN OF MY HEART
By: Deb Woodward

I have been blessed to have had biological children and I think that has been the greatest accomplishment of our lives, but adoption has proved me to think differently on that.

Just eight years ago, after a long painful process of heartache and disappointment and several losses of pregnancy, our hearts were looking for a way to fill this void we shared.

After attending a few local WORLD CHILD meetings at a local church, adoption became a very hopeful thought.

We started the process to seek an infant male from Guatemala. We can't begin to tell you the excitement the day our assignment arrived. We fell in love with Caleb. Each month new pictures came and we bonded closer and closer with each new set of pictures.

The day we arrived in Guatemala, he was placed in my arms, so fresh, so sweet, and warm. There was an instant unconditional love greater than giving birth. The joy we experienced at that moment was so high, that if this were my last moment on earth, I would have been fulfilled.

After arriving home with this precious cargo, I Knew I would like to adopt again because the experience was so awesome. WORLD CHILD was OUTSTANDING and kept their word in handling EVERYTHING from finances, to photos, medical updates, and the great news of "ITS A BOY!"

It seemed impossible because of the many fees, but with determination we somehow managed to bring home another infant boy, JULIAN, at age 4 months old. WOW, what can I say except it was the most awesome experience once again! And believe it or not, five years ago on Mother's Day, we adopted IDENTICAL TRIPLET GIRLS FROM GUATEMALA!!

JULIANNA JOY, MICHAELLA MARIE, GABRIELLA GRACE topped our adoption experience, as we never knew how we would finance so many, and we did with a great faith and perseverance and all our children are fine, healthy, and beautiful, and have given us their hearts...

Our five children adopted from Guatemala are very intelligent and offer love, help, and support to many and to each other. They all won a writers award in their school this year due to their remarkable stories of "Why I am Special". As our family has seen the many wonderful things we have guided these children with and got through sleepless nights and potty training four at once, doing parent conferences for five our primary school, four in kindergarten, and one in first grade.

We realized we still had a lot of room in our hearts and lives to share a big more. In October 2004 we adopted Graciella Mae and she came home in Sweetest Day. Wow!

I know why we had such a strong desire to persevere this detailed process over and over again. We worked with great agencies, World Child and Family Connections. Our terrific social worker Sue Saur, has been a role model, a guide, and now a lifelong friend.

Then we met Anita with Family Connections, who was super with the Homestudy Preparation, always returning my calls, mailing me sticky notes with simple instructions. Another great person, Cheryl Oakes, our regional leader who always returns phone calls, helped me with numerous questions and even lots of my paperwork. She has also become a part of our new extended adoption family.

Dorene Whitaker is a person I can't say enough about, because she is "Miss Guatemala" to us and to many. She is down to earth, and a pleasure to work with. When I've called her numerous times, even over common sense questions, she always explained what to do, send me sticky notes with simple instructions, and also will be a lifelong friend. She also sets up events with safe drivers such as Hugo and Henry in Guatemala, that when I traveled alone they were at my side and guided me each day. They could direct me to find what I needed or where to go.

You see, it was all of these people and so many more that we have met down the adoption road and that is why we have felt at ease to help so many children. We have made some of the dearest friends through adoption.

We share summer picnics together, holiday parties and throughout the year we often think of how adoption has given us a whole new outlook on life and especially getting the joy of helping a child learn to read and write, get tubes in their ears to help them hear. Knowing you helped a child to overcome a problem that may have caused them permanent damage to their senses. The blessings are countless.

So, if you have to drive an older vehicle, have spaghetti every week, shop at garage sales, give up a big closet and put my own needs second, it has been my reason to get up each morning and deal with whatever the day has to offer. Some days are tiring. But all days end with a warm fuzzy feeling. It’s the whole picture above that has created this warmth for us and so many others. I hope our story has given you that warm fuzzy feeling because that’s what adoption is all about.

You know, I may not have given birth to these six precious angels from my womb, but I have of my heart, and do you want to know something else? Our bond is so strong that I would lay down my life for theirs to go upon, for it is beyond words to explain what they have meant to our lives. After meeting each baby in Guatemala and bonding instantly, we both knew that no matter what, they were born of our hearts.

Cheryl Oakes
Family Connections
International Adoption Coordinator
716.741.4826

SUCCESS FROM CHINA

“You are a mom” – I will never forget those wonderful words spoken by my social worker when she called to let me know that my second daughter Pearl Mae Yu Rong was waiting for me in China. My daughter was seven months old and living in a Social Welfare Institute in the Guangdong Province. I couldn’t wait to hold her in my arms.

Several months before that moment I never thought a second adoption from China was within my reach. I am a single mother and I received a phone call from that same social worker letting me know that China was going to limit the number of adoptions to single women and that this restriction would begin in less than two months. So I frantically called Family Connections and with their help I was able to complete my home study and dossier just in time (24 hours to spare). Without Family Connections quick response to my needs, Pearl would not be my daughter and Rose (my first daughter) would not have a wonderful little sister.

Pearl is my “precious gem” from China (her Chinese name means precious jewel). Pearl was found in the entrance of a village in a box wrapped in an orange towel. She was taken to the local Social Welfare Institution at the age of two days old where she lived until she was placed in my arms the day she turned nine months old (March 25, 2003). I met my daughter for the first time in the conference room of the Adoption Registry Center. I was excited, nervous, and overwhelmed with joy. She was also overwhelmed by the tremendous turn her life just took – a mom?

Pearl was a quiet and shy baby (or so I thought). Initially Pearl spent much of her time sleeping and avoiding interaction with me (her coping strategies). I was a little concerned. However, within days she was giggling and playing with me like we had known each other forever. Now at 2 ½ years old she is an out-going and gregarious child who loves life and is always giggling or making others giggle.

Pearl was initially challenged by developmental delays. When she was placed in my arms at nine months old, she could not roll over, sit up, or grasp toys and her hip muscles were very tight due to lack of use. Well, even before we left China for home (10 days later), Pearl was rolling across the room, sitting up by herself for a few moments, and reaching for toys. It was like watching development in fast forward. Once we arrived home, Pearl quickly developed the skills to sit up, crawl, and grasp everything she could get her hands on. She was walking at the age of twelve months and hasn’t stopped running yet. Today at 2 ½ years old she is a very physically active child who is developing normally. She loves to run, jump, kick balls, ice skate, and participate in gymnastics.

Pearl is also very bright. She is a big talker and likes to tell stories about her adventures and sing her favorite songs (at the top of her lungs). She has learned her colors and shapes and is starting to recognize letters and numbers. I must say, she is growing up too fast.

Pearl has brought joy to my life. I thank Family Connections for helping to make my dreams of parenting come true and for finding a mom for this little girl from a Chinese orphanage.

ADOPTION FROM ETHIOPIA

The decision to adopt was an easy one, as a couple in our 40s with one biological son, we knew we wanted to add to our family and were excited to have the opportunity to provide a home for a child who needed one. Ethiopia was a logical choice for us as well. As a bi-racial family, we felt confident that we could provide a positive example and a culturally comfortable environment for an African child. The next phase of our adoption journey began with Family Connections. Because our family situation is complicated with some health issues, Family Connections worked with us as we explained our challenges to the agencies working in Ethiopia. Our chosen Ethiopia agency and Family Connections worked well together throughout the process.

Our paperwork was completed in 4 months, with the last piece of paperwork being faxed on December 24th to our adoption agency. We knew the wait from that point would be about 5 months to referral. Five months later, almost to the date, we got the phone call that told us we had a second son. 3 month old Mucie Siyum was waiting for us in Ethiopia. Mucie, which translates as Moses, was quickly accepted by us and eagerly awaited by his big brother.

About two weeks after we accepted the referral, we learned that our new son had been hospitalized with an infection and that another baby from the same orphanage had not survived a similar infection. What a surreal experience, having a sick child on the other side of the world who isn’t officially yours, but with whom you are already connected. Family Connections was a big help in getting us through that difficult challenge and working to put things in place in case it became necessary for us to travel quickly. Fortunately, due to the amazing care provided by the agency staff in Ethiopia, Mucie weathered this storm.

A short 4 weeks after our referral, my aunt and I (my husband wasn’t able to make the trip) were in Ethiopia meeting Mucie, the agency staff, and the other babies and toddlers waiting to be adopted. We also had the chance to meet some of Mucie’s birth family including his 70 year old grandmother, his 3 siblings, and one of his uncles.

Mucie is a healthy, happy 4 month old. He is working diligently trying to roll over. His huge eyes follow us everywhere – you can tell he doesn’t want to miss a thing. He smiles, laughs, babbles non-stop, and loves to be helped to a standing position. His latest nickname, given by his grandma, is “piggy” because he eats non-stop. He especially loves to be fed by, play with and be kissed by his big brother.

The agency in Ethiopia is to be given much credit for Mucie’s success. Not only did they help him through a very difficult medical challenge, but they take marvelous care of all of the children in their care. Each of the children is played with, kissed, hugged, and loved.

For us, adoption has been a marvelous choice and as our blog title indicates, we are twice blessed – once with our biological son and our second blessing is a son destined to be a part of our family through adoption.

FAMILY STORY FROM TONI KAPEN

My husband and I set off onto the adoption journey “fully prepared”, for we were two social workers. Little did we know! As an inter- racial couple many referrals were shown to us. In the early days of our adoption journey we were waiting for the perfect child to come along, not realizing that there is no guarantee in life and there is a larger plan in adoption. Eventually every family winds up with the little bundle of joy that that is meant for them. Marnie became our first “perfect child”. In our case we identified special needs in our Marnie at age three, but what better family than ours that had two professionals and endless love to bring her along. Initially I expected to adopt only one child but Marnie opened up the world of Motherhood to me. We went on to adopt Emily. Fifteen months later we were again chosen by a birthmother and we were ready to leave to pick up the baby. The phone rang and it was our agency calling. They said “I hope you’re sitting down but Emily’s birthmom just gave birth to another baby boy and asked if you would parent?. Of course we said yes. And this is how Matthew arrived. So as I said earlier there really is a larger plan in adoption and things work out as they are meant too.

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